Friday Funny: Working In A Winter Wonderland

Inspired by all the things that can go wrong in your facility during this festive time of year, facility manager Charles Carpenter pens a “Winter Wonderland” song parody.

Working In A Winter Wonderland

A Facility Management-Inspired Song Parody
By Charles Carpenter, CFM
(To be sung to the tune of “Winter Wonderland,”
written in 1934 by Felix Bernard and lyricist Richard B. Smith)

winter wonderland Song Parody
(Credit: Jochen Sand)

Christmas Lights
UL Rated?
Keurig machine
Confiscated.
Trip hazards affright
Who cares ’bout my plight?
Working in a winter wonderland!

Gone away
went the Wi-Fi.
Hear complaints
and the outcry.
Their words not discreet
I cannot repeat…
Working in a winter wonderland!

In the lobby someone built a snowman
and won’t clean him up before the melt.
I’ll send the dayporters, they’ll say no man.
Here goes another thing
For me to dwelt!

Later on
We’ll perspire
As frayed cords
catch on fire.
I’ll say I’m afraid
Of an OSHA raid…
Working in a winter wonderland!

Snow from shredding
That takes moxie.
Violates
Sarbanes Oxley.
Just let out a sigh
More crap to decry…
Working in a winter wonderland!

Gone away
is the bonus.
And that makes
all want to cuss.
I can’t say the word
Just thought that I heard…
Working in a winter wonderland!

In the break room, someone stuck another tree.
Without water, it quickly turns brown.
Won’t have lots of fun with Mr. Dead-Tree
When it almost burns the building down!

When bells ding
It ain’t thrilling.
Your ears ring
like they’re drilling.
They frolic and play,
FMs slog away…
Working in a winter wonderland!
Working in a winter wonderland!

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