Friday Funny: Standard Airport Renovation, Or Upgrade For The Lizard People?

If you travel through Denver International Airport (DEN) soon, you may notice some strange stuff going on. Well, stranger than usual. DEN has been the subject of some odd rumors and controversies since it opened in 1995, and is known for housing some unusual features. There’s a 32-foot-tall demonic blue horse—dubbed “Blucifer”—at the airport entrance, gargoyles in the baggage claim area, and a cornerstone covered with Masonic symbols. There are rumors that there is a network of underground tunnels, or even a whole buried city, occupied by aliens and/or lizard people.

Rather than deny the conspiracy theories, the airport has embraced them, and is putting them to good use during its current renovation project. In July, DEN formally kicked off the start of construction of a three-and-a-half-year renovation project of its Great Hall.

On August 31, large posters hinting at what might really be going on were installed on the blank walls covering up the construction work. Part of a marketing campaign around the renovation project, the posters suggest that the featured aliens, gargoyles, and lizard people are a joke, and that the blank walls all over the airport are concealing a normal remodeling project.

Or are they?

Here’s a quick rundown of DENs wildest rumors, straight from the airport itself:

• A dedication marker and plaques around the airport claim it was funded by “The New World Airport Commission,” but no such group has ever existed. This has led people to jump to the conclusion that it is actually a group within the New World Order.
• One of the above-mentioned plaques was placed over a time capsule that also has a Masonic square, a compass symbol, and an inscription that gives the time capsule’s contents to the “people of Colorado in 2094”–all symbols of Freemasonry and the Illuminati. The date of the airport’s dedication is March 19, 1994—or 1+9+1+9+9+4, which equals 33­—the highest level one can achieve in Freemasonry, aka perfection. Finally, the airport building costs were more expensive than originally thought. Conspiracy theorists believe this money went to building the Illuminati headquarters in the form of a secret underground lair.

  

• Glaring gargoyle sculptures, the big blue horse sculpture, and 28-foot-wide murals are thought to be clues to the sinister influence of the airport–the aforementioned Freemasons, Illuminati and New World Order. The blue horse’s glowing eyes are often interpreted as reference to the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse (it doesn’t help that the sculpture’s creator Luis Jiménez died while making it).
• It’s also rumored there are several underground baggage tunnels just waiting to house the world’s elite when the world comes to an end. Lizard people (aka “Reptoids”) and evidence of aliens are also thought to be down there.

So, what’s really going on behind those blank walls and creepy posters? Is the airport expanding the bunkers? Revamping the lizards’ lairs? Giving the gargoyles a much-needed makeover? Can you handle the truth?