FM Frequency | Facility Executive - Creating Intelligent Buildings

Facility manager Charles Carpenter flexes his poetic muscle yet again with a fishy, fragrant take on the classic Winter holiday song, Jingle Bells. 


https://facilityexecutive.com/2016/12/friday-funny-jingle-bells-jingle-smells/
Facility manager Charles Carpenter flexes his poetic muscle yet again with a fishy, fragrant take on the classic Winter holiday song, Jingle Bells. 
07/24/2021
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FM Frequency

This thought provoking op/ed column takes a humorous look at topics relevant to the many facets of facility management.

    Latest: Friday Funny: Jingle Bells, Jingle Smells - Facility manager Charles Carpenter flexes his poetic muscle yet again with a fishy, fragrant take on the classic Winter holiday song, Jingle Bells. 

    Friday Funny: Jingle Bells, Jingle Smells

    Friday Funny
    Facility manager Charles Carpenter flexes his poetic muscle yet again with a fishy, fragrant take on the classic Winter holiday song, Jingle Bells. 

    New Year’s Task: Building Envelope Check

    FM Frequency
    With gingerbread house construction a tradition for many this time of year, it may also be time to ensure the integrity of facility exteriors.

    FM Frequency: Moving Targets

    FM Frequency
    In the unpredictable arena of facility security, evaluating the organization and its physical attributes for a 360° view is an important starting point.

    FM Frequency: The Free Range Office

    FM Frequency
    Is the heightened focus on collaboration and interaction in the workplace causing occupants to lose their focus?

    FM Frequency: It’s Not Easy Being Green(er)

    FM Frequency
    Even the best laid sustainability initiatives can be foiled by unaware, unresponsive, or just plain unwilling occupants.

    FM Frequency: In-House Sociologist

    FM Frequency
    Among the many hats facility managers wear, the ability to field odd requests and mediate occupant disputes is a necessity.

    FM Frequency: Historic Sites – Challenges, Opportunities

    FM Frequency
    Whoever said some things only get better with age probably was not a facility manager.

    FM Frequency: Occupant Well-Being

    FM Frequency
    Cleaning policies are paramount, but other aspects impact the health quotient of a facility.

    FM Frequency: Taking Care Of Business

    FM Frequency
    In this discussion of trimming costs, paying homage to Elvis Presley tunes seems fitting.

    FM Frequency: Best Of The Best

    FM Frequency
    Churchill’s not in the running, so nominate an outstanding facility manager you know today. From the September 2013 issue.

    FM Frequency: A Place Called Subiaco

    FM Frequency
    A sprawling campus in western Arkansas is a vibrant nonprofit, multiuse facility. From the July 2013 issue.

    FM Frequency: Warning Signs

    FM Frequency
    More subtle than outright violence, hostility in the workplace can go undetected. From the May 2013 issue.

    FM Frequency: Lost In Translation?

    FM Frequency
    Operating a facility in another country can require some study, especially when it comes to cultural references and matters of measurement. From the March 2013 issue of Today's Facility Manager.

    FM Frequency: Green Is In The Eye Of The Beholder

    FM Frequency
    Any effort to increase sustainability is positive, unless it’s not. What defines sustainability for an organization depends on a variety of factors.

    FM Frequency: Handling A Delicate Subject

    FM Frequency
    For facility management professionals, establishing a protocol for breastfeeding in the workplace presents its share of very practical challenges. An amendment to the Fair Labor Standards Act (FLSA) requires workplaces to provide reasonable accommodations for nursing mothers.

    FM Frequency: Machines Don’t Clean Buildings…People Do: Part 2

    FM Frequency
    In the second part of this examination, Carpenter breaks down the realities of finding the right player for the cleaning game in your facility.

    FM Frequency: Machines Don’t Clean Buildings…People Do: Part 1

    FM Frequency
    In part one of this series, Carpenter explains how providing janitorial services to facilities can be a truly thankless task, but it doesn't have to be.

    FM Frequency: Who Wrote The “Book” On Facility Management?

    FM Frequency
    Keeping vital information up to date may seem like a tedious task, but it's one of the most essential aspects of successful operations.

    FM Frequency: Don’t Be A Lighthouse Keeper

    FM Frequency
    When working with a multi-generational staff, facility managers must understand why employees behave in certain ways.

    FM Frequency: The Facility Manager In The Gray Flannel Suit

    FM Frequency
    Carpenter makes reference to a classic 1956 Gregory Peck film to illustrate the facility professional's struggle with duality.

    FM Frequency: Pinching Pennies; Counting Quarters

    FM Frequency
    Think it's impossible to justify your own salary by scrimping and saving? FM Frequency Columnist Charles Carpenter suggests you think again.

    FM Frequency: An Argument In Favor Of Human Cloning

    FM Frequency
    Columnist Carpenter makes the humorous—yet credible—case for facility management doppelgängers.

    FM Frequency: OSHA Does NOT Necessarily Mean Oh Sh–!

    FM Frequency
    It doesn't take all that much effort for the proactive facility manager to benefit from—rather than panic at the thought of—an OSHA inspection.

    FM Frequency: How Green Is Green?

    FM Frequency
    Despite sustainability's established foothold, Carpenter has some issues with its definition.

    FM Frequency: Feel Free To Blame Tortilla Chips

    FM Frequency
    The chips will fall where they may, but FM Frequency Columnist Charles Carpenter makes the case for more sustainable corn chip consumption.

    FM Frequency: Exit, Stage Right

    FM Frequency
    FM Frequency Columnist Charles Carpenter is all about common sense, not stage directions, with this very practical advice on fire safety in facilities.

    FM Frequency: Walking In Another Fm’s Shoes

    FM Frequency
    FM Frequency Columnist Charles Carpenter takes a field trip and gains perspective on what it

    FM Frequency: Career Day

    FM Frequency
    When FM Frequency Columnist Charles Carpenter makes the lecture circuit at local high schools and colleges, everyone learns a little something about facilities management.

    FM Frequency: Don’t Take Your Guns To Work

    FM Frequency
    TFM Columnist Charles Carpenter tackles a controversial topic as he transitions into FM Frequency Columnist.

    FM Frequency: Reducing Expenses In 2010? Thanks Uncle Sam!

    FM Frequency
    Sarcasm is hip deep this month as FM Frequency Columnist Jeff Crane vents his budget cutting spleen.

    FM Frequency: Cutting Costs And Adding Flexibility

    FM Frequency
    In challenging times, repurposing or reconfiguring facility spaces can help.

    FM Frequency: Powerful Realities

    FM Frequency
    Columnist Jeff Crane ponders long-term alternative energy options in response to cap and trade possibilities

    FM Frequency: There’s Something In The Air…Or Is There?

    FM Frequency
    In this expanded FM Frequency offering, Jeff Crane explains how an indoor air quality complaint triggered this hypothetical investigation.

    FM Frequency: Feverish Forum Recap

    FM Frequency
    In an unprecedented act of humility (and a touch of insanity), FM Frequency Columnist Jeff Crane interviews...himself!

    FM Frequency: Suburban Facilities Need Love Too

    FM Frequency
    FM Frequency Columnist Jeff Crane makes the case for smart economic development in suburbia.

    FM Frequency: Lean Budgets = Creative Training…

    FM Frequency
    TFM Columnist Jeff Crane argues that professional development shouldn't come to a screeching halt when there's no money to participate in far flung conferences.

    FM Frequency: A New Regulatory “Environment”

    FM Frequency
    TFM Columnist Jeff Crane ponders the debate on how legislation should be used to direct reductions in carbon dioxide emissions.

    FM Frequency: Elementary, My Dear Watson (Part 2)

    FM Frequency
    FM Frequency Columnist Jeff Crane presents this conclusion to his moldy vacation cottage investigation.

    FM Frequency: Sustaining Optimism

    FM Frequency
    TFM Columnist Jeff Crane says the best days are ahead

    FM Frequency: Elementary, My Dear Watson (Part 1)

    FM Frequency
    In the first part of this facility riddle, Crane challenges readers to don their thinking caps.
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