FROSTY THE FM
An adaptation by Charles C. Carpenter, CFM
Frosty the FM
Was not a diplomat,
With no sense of cold and an ego bold
And two keys for thermostats.
Frosty the FM
Is immune to the temperature they say.
He must be made of snow and the employees know
That the building will be freezing each day.
There must have been some magic in that
E-mail address they found.
For when they copied his manager
He began to come around.
Oh Frosty the FM
Was ornery as he could be,
And the employees say he would adjust the stat
By ‘bout a half degree.
Thumpity thump thump; thumpity thump thump
Look at Frosty go!
Thumpity thump thump ; thumpity thump thump
Freezing out each row!
Frosty the FM
Knew the sun was hot that day,
So he cranked the chiller and sat like a pillar
As his phone would ring away.
Down in the office
With a broomstick in his hand,
Unblocking ducts and vents while dropping hints
He’ll catch them if he can.
Workers went down the stairs of brown
Right to the HR Head,
But he only paused a moment
Before he blew off what was said.
For Frosty the FM
Had to hurry on his way
But he waved goodbye saying, don’t you cry
It’ll be cold again Monday.
thumpity thump thump; thumpity thump thump
Look at Frosty go!
thumpity thump thump; thumpity thump thump
Freezing out each row!
Carpenter is the the magazine’s FM Frequency Columnist. Last year, he shared his adaptation of “Twas The Night Before Christmas.”
